Speakin of Stupid

You know, when I listens to the news these days, and I hears some brainee politisian spoutin some nonsense like only folks in Washington knows how to do, I can't hep but recollect the words of ol Honest Abe;  " tis better to be silent and thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt."  Now, I sometimes says some things ought not be said.  And I spose I has now and again spouted off some perty fine nonsense.  That mostly cause I generly ingage my mouth afore my brain.  Anyways, when you gets to bein my age, folks just nachurally make allowances for you.  Ever time I says somthin mule stupid, folks just say, "ol B B can't hep it, cause he is old".   And I is might proud to use that as my ekscuse.  But them fellers in Washington, ain't got no ekscuse.  They ain't old as B. B. and they sur nuff got more book learnin. 
But you know,  the way I figure, most everbody got a bit a stupid they carry around inside, and ever once in a while it just kinda sneaks out when theys least ecspects it.  I spect I wood have a mite more teeth in my mouth if'n I just could'a kept some a that stupid inside when I were a young'un.  But you know ol B B, he jus can't keep his jowls shut mor'n five seconds but what he think he gonna explode.  Sos I spout off and next thin you knows we be dancin the two fist polka.
It don't make no never mind tho.  I has enjoyd ever minute.  I don't think I wood change a thing even if'n I
could.  Remember, Life is what you make it.  Don't waste it folks.  Live it.

Play Somethin Perty, Sweet

I spose its about time for a good yarn today.  Some folks consider a yarn to be a tall tale or a made up story.  Well sir, I gots plenty yarn to spin from the onest to goodness true storytellin of my youth.  Lord, I remembers things what would make your hair curl up like Shirley Temple.  I has seen and dunn more in my years than most folks dreams of.  Some I kin repeat and some I spose I best not.  

I recollect I spent some time in Chicago in the early 20s after hoppin trains for a spell.  I took to checkin out the local clubs and speak-easies at night as I had a hankerin for music and a tolerable likin for mash.  I weren't no great shakes as a musician but sometimes theys would let me sit in with the band.  I took a real shine to them fellers and we shore had a fine ol time.  One of them fellers went by the name a Olly.   Olly played horn and I played a tolerable guitar.  Ever once in a while Ol Olly would pull that horn down from his lips, look over at me and say, play somethin perty, Sweet.

Ol Olly and me, we would paint the town when we weren't musican.  We didn't go alookin for trouble you know, but it seem like it sure enuff could find us perty frequent.  That feller were a fine friend and he pulled me out of a scrape or two whiles we was livin on the south side.  I spent nearly three year in Chicago and us two fellers played more music and drank more mash than mos folks does in a lifetime.  When I left town, Ol Olly and me tried to keep in touch for a while but ventually, the letters and Christmas cards quit comin. 
Then one day in 1958 I gets a letter.  This young lady says would I be the B B Sweet what used to play guitar in a place call the Red Diamond in Chicago.  She say her daddy is Oliver Young and is not well.  She tell me that he ask to see me.  Well, I went straight down to that train station and hitched a ride for Chicago the next day.  I spent two weeks with Ol Olly, rememberin and talkin bout the good ol days.  Them last couple days, Olly couldn't talk much no more, but he sit and listen to me go on bout the old days and ever once in a while he would smile.  The last words I hear Ol Olly say were - play somethin perty, Sweet.


Remember folks, tis sweet to remember what was hard to endure.

Still Fishin

Well sir, I sur enuff did catch me a mess a fish last week.  Most enjoyedment I has had in I can't remember when.  I mean to tell you, them catfish was itchin to be catched so bad, a feller hardly even need bait.  Well maybe a smidgen.  Lord amighty that was a good time.
Folks I has to tell you, there ain't much in this here world give ol B B more pleassure than a good day at the fishin hole.  Don't much matter if'n I catch a big mess or not.  Jus sittin on that creek bank, suckin in that fresh country air is right near enuff to plant a smile cross my face what would last a month.  If'n you has a passel of problems, they is one shur fired way to chase away them blues.  Grab yoself a pole and chase on down to the nearest fishin hole.  They ain;t nothin in this world is better medicine. 


Thought for the day : Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.
Mark Twain

Fish Medicine

Another beautimus day on the mountain.  I swear I is feelin mighty favorable toward a trip to the creek.  My ol sawbones keep on tellin me I has to take it easy, not strane myself and such.  But I has a feeling a little fishin exspidition might be jus what the doctor ordered.  Ol B B been cooped up and drugged up all winter long.  I be takin a notion to kick up now that I is feelin human again. 
A feller can get mighty low layin flat a his back for to long a spell.  But sunshine and a five pound catfish will most surely britin up his gizzard.  I jus wish ol Silas were still topside sos he could come along and help carry back the fine mess I is gonna catch.  Me and ol Silas dang neart fished out every creek in the county when we was younguns.  Weren't two better fishin buddies afore or since.
I suppose you be a noticin I kina miss ol Silas.  Happens every year bout this time.  Soon as I starts to  hankerin to do some fishin, I naturlly starts thinkin bout him.  Well ol buddy, I think I'll jus take two poles with me today sos I can catch somes for both of us.

Remember, a bad day a fishin is better than a good day a workin.

Fishin Story

Well if'n anybody care to know, ol' B.B. is feelin much better.  I might even feel up to makin garden in a few weeks.  Lord knows I was a mite puny there fer a spell.  But I thinks this fine weather is bout to make my gizzard stand up and bark again. 
I has been lookin forward to spring for quite a spell now.  Now I is chompin at the bit to get out and tend garden and wet my line in the creek.  This time a year I almost feels like a kid again.  When I starts to feelin purky, I begins to relive my youth.  I recollect a time, I think it was a few years afore the big war,  that be WWI, when me and my buddy Silas went down to ol' man Jennings pond.  We uns knowd we weren't supposed to be there, but we'd hear tell that they was some powerful big catfish in that there pond.  Well that kind a talk was just like wavin a red flag afront of mean old bull.  Me and Silas took off one mornin when we knowd ol man Jennings was drivin his team into town, and we snuck through the back pasture to the pond.  Within a couple a hours we had landed mite near a dozen good size catfish and was figurin on how we was gonna clean them fish and then make tracks afore ol man Jennings got back from town.  Bout that time ol Silas let out a yell that'd curl your hair.  I ran over to wheres Silas was a layin and a moanin.  I looks down at his foot and I be dogged if they weren't snappin turtle had aholt a Silas toe and wouldn't let go come hell nor high water.  I beat on that dad blasted turtle for what musted been 10 minutes afore that blasted animal finally turnt loose.  Ol Silas was a bleedin somthin fierce sos I grabbed aholt of him and was headin him back for home when Silas hollered , what bout them fish we catched.  I told him I couldn' t fetch him and the fish both.  So, there we were,  two young uns, tryin to figure out what was most important, them fine catfish we catched or Silas big toe.  Well, the toe finally won out, but not afore we did some serious cussin and discussin.  They weren't never two more broken hearted boys in this world than me and ol Silas when we turnt loose them catfish in ol man Jennings pond, sos I could fetch Silas back home to patch up his big toe.

"All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure. " <Mark Twain>

Sick and Tired

Been sick and tired these last few weeks.  But ol Grim Reaper ain't got aholt a me yet.  It'll take a might more than a few old flu bugs to take Ol B B down.  I recollect back in 1919 how folks all over was frettin bout the sickness spreadin cross this country.  Weren't a family I knowd that weren't touched by it.  It was a mighty sorrowful time.  Soldiers just comin back from Europe, most of em just happy to have made it out of that war alive.  Then they finds theyselves in the middle of another powerful struggle and once again it seem like death were everywhere. 
But like my onry ole mule, Sally, I just too dadburn stubburn to get sick and pass on.  I has dissapointed the gate keeper so many times I suspect he just about given up on me.  Don't bother me none.  I'll keep a walkin top side til ol St Pete and Lucifer get it figured out which one of em gets stuck with me. 
I is feelin a might tired now.  I reckon I had better get some rest.  Remember, keep your feet on the ground and keep reachin for the stars.